Strengthen Your Language Skills by Removing These Four Words

Several days ago, both my wife and I realized that our son, who is three years old, was using the word 'just' in a way that caught us off guard.

Example: Parent: "It's time for dinner"

Child: "I'm just {insert whatever he is doing}"

We (my wife and I) realized that we had been guilty of doing the same thing, and that he likely picked it up from us. It was one of those about-face moments you have as a parent - we realized that we both had a tendency to use it a lot, and upon reflection, 'just' is a filler word that adds little value, softens the meaning of what has being said, and diminishes the value of what the other person has said.

Example: Me (to a coworker): "I'm having a hard time getting this stupid software feature to work"

Coworker: "Oh, you just click this, clack that, and there ya go"

Me (now feeling stupid): "..."

In fact, the only times we could think that 'just' is appropriate is in terms of justice (ie, "That is a just law"), or when used in a temporal context (ie, "I just finished painting the house").

We've since begun to call each other out when we hear the word 'just', and it is surprising how often I finish saying something, get called out for using the word 'just' (our son has even done it a few times!), think back and not even realize I said it. That is how engrained the use of that word is when I speak!

I was recently writing up a deliverable for a customer engagement, and during the course of writing it, I noticed there were a lot of times that Word underlined a phrase in blue, and the suggestion was to use more concise language. At first, I didn't think much of it, but after the umpteenth time, I started to think that maybe I had fallen into a habit where I use more words and syllables than is necessary. When I proofread my document through that lens, I found myself honing in on the words would, could, and should - three words that I've previously read are overused, soften language, and in some cases are passive aggressive.

Sure enough, when I re-read what I had written, anywhere there was a would/could/should, I realized I was couching what I was saying. I think that in my mind, after going through the mental exercise of distilling down all the technical factors of the situation into a written form, I wanted to hedge against coming across too strong or too forceful. Yet, when I read them from the point of view of someone who didn't go through the mental exercises I did, my writing came across as unconvinced of itself and a bit timid.

I've since looked into the words just, would, could and should, and there are certainly times when their use is appropriate. However, the vast majority of the time they are overused, so if you have to err on one side, err on the side of striking them from your vocabulary.